Ward 1 Aldermanic Candidacy Application Page 15
I want to be a Ward 1 Alderman:
(a) to hack my way into Skull & Bones
(b) to pad my resume
(c) because of white guilt
(d) all of the above
The most pressing issue facing New Haven is:
(b) town/gown relations
(c) not enough wretched clothing chains
(d) I don't know. I decided to run today
An aldermanic candidate should never:
(a) commit vote fraud
(b) participate in race-bating
(c) know what he's talking about
(d) be a Republican
The New Haven Democratic Machine is:
(b) very good.
(c) very very good.
(d) strangling the life out of this city (just kidding—I
really think it's the salvation of the West).